The virus has stirred us awake, no longer allowing us to live on autopilot. Before coronavirus, many of us slept walked through life – each day looking similar to the day before. But now we are reminded that tomorrow isn’t promised and we feel fear and maybe a bit of panic too.
The question is what do we do with that fear. Do we allow ourselves to sit in it? Or do we distract ourselves to the point of numbing? I get it. That’s one of my coping mechanisms too. The problem is eventually we can’t escape it. What we resist persists – it’s the law of the universe. So if you’re afraid, try admitting it. I am afraid. Sit in it and see what comes up even if it’s uncomfortable. I did that this morning, and then realized I needed to journal about it, needing the space of the page to see what was really going on.
So here’s what I learned: Even though I lost my child when he was nine years old, I have become complacent. None of us are guaranteed tomorrow, but I often live as if I’m promised it, pushing things off that I don’t feel strong enough, good enough, ready enough to do today.
Maybe those of us who are scared are the lucky ones because we are waking up. We are reminded that each moment is a gift and we now get to choose to live it more fully. I can admit I’m scared, but I get to choose what I do next. I get to tell the people in my life that I love them and why I appreciate them. I get to have those vulnerable conversations, things I usually put off thinking another day will be better. I get to discover and learn and breathe because, in this moment, I am here.
What do you get to do?
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